Roger Marsh: Welcome back to Family Talk. I'm Roger Marsh, and today on the program we're going to hear more about Jessa Dillow Crisp and her story of how she survived being a victim of human trafficking. It's part two of a classic three-part conversation that Jessa and her husband John had with our own Dr. James Dobson just a few years ago. Before we go any further, I want to ask parents to use discretion as the content of this episode is intended for mature audiences only.
Now, yesterday we heard part one of Jessa's story. She shared how she experienced horrific abuse at the hands of her own biological family, and that started at a very young age. Thankfully, she was able to escape by the time she reached the age of 21 and she moved to the United States. Now, if you miss the first part of Jessa's story, I really do encourage you to listen to it because her testimony is very, very powerful. By the way, you can listen to it when you go to our website at drjamesdobson.org.
Now, let me tell you a little bit about our guests today. Jessa Dillow Crisp is the co-founder and CEO of BridgeHope, an anti-trafficking non-profit organization located in Denver, Colorado. Just last year, Bridge Hope merged with the Avery Center, the National Trafficking Sheltered Alliance, and HopeBound Collective. Today, Jessica is pursuing a Ph.D. in counselor education and supervision and has her own private practice. Her husband, John Crisp, is the co-founder of Bridge Hope. He also serves as the next-gen director and young adults pastor at Crossroads Community Church here in Colorado. Today, Jessa will share how she was able to attend school for the very first time, and that her student visa allowed her to stay in the United States. And during that time, she let Jesus Christ into her life and was radically transformed. Her husband, John, will also join the conversation again. John will share his initial reaction to hearing about her trauma and her past to being trafficked.
The couple will also tell us about their passion to help young people break free from the chains of sex trafficking. Well, let's rejoin this conversation. It was recorded back in 2018 and features Jessa and John Crisp, along with our own Dr. Dobson. Jessa shares how she was able to escape back to Colorado for a second time.
Dr. James Dobson: Jessa, you've brought us to a point now that as you're in a formalized prostitution ring and being gang raped, I can't even imagine what that's like. Where'd you go from there? How'd you get out of that?
Jessa Crisp: So, once again, the woman in Colorado who had invested in my life and who had helped me previous and who actually helped me escape the first time, she was the person that I reached out to and she actually helped me escape the second time.
Dr. James Dobson: You're kidding me.
Jessa Crisp: And so, I came back to Colorado and once again, only had a six month tourist visa. So, here I am kind of in the same predicament going, I will have to go back to Canada if I don't figure out another way to stay in the States. And for a person who's been through so much trauma, it definitely puts a lot of fear and questions and it creates instability. And so in that place, I was not wanting to unpack my suitcase and not wanting to get settled or even go to therapy just because in the back of my head I was like, "I'm going to have to go back to Canada."
I'm going to have to leave the safety that I know. And so, the board directors at the Safe House, and this woman came up with a plan for me to go to school. Now, if you remember from yesterday, I had never been to school my entire life. Not elementary school, not middle school, not high school. So, when they said that to me, I kind of laughed it off and was like, "Are you serious? Nah, not happening." And made a lot of noise, went to my bedroom, slammed the door, and was having a temper tantrum basically.
And it was told to me that day, "Jessa, if you can read, you can learn anything." So, I actually took a black sharpie and I pulled it out and in my room, I wrote on my arm, if I can read, I can learn anything. And we went to the library and picked up books and I started to study. So, I did one of my first essays as my college application and was able to get into Nazarene Bible College and started my educational journey. And so-
Dr. James Dobson: And you were accepted?
Jessa Crisp: ...I was accepted. And when I got that acceptance letter, I don't think I've cried as much as I did that day because it was like, "I maybe have value. Maybe I can be better than just being a little prostitute."
Dr. James Dobson: And as a student, the U.S. government allowed you to stay.
Jessa Crisp: They did. So, I got an F-1 student visa, and it was pretty exciting because my first exam that I ever got back was a Psych 101 exam, and I got a 100% on it and I was like, "Oh my gosh." Yeah, I like to study night and day for this thing, but I can actually do it and I'm actually intelligent. I'm not stupid. Growing up, my messages that were told to me were, "Jessa, you're too stupid to do anything but sex work." And here I'm holding this exam going, "I am valuable and I am smart because Jesus Christ has made me able to go to school and study."
Dr. James Dobson: John, I am so captivated by this story. I haven't really given you a chance to talk much, but-
John Crisp: That's okay.
Dr. James Dobson: ...does your heart grieve now thinking about the woman you love being a little child and being abused in such a wretched way?
John Crisp: Yeah, in fact, shortly after Jessa and I started dating, I got a phone call from her, very serious tone in her voice, and she said, "You need to come over and we need to talk." And this was probably one of the longest car rides of my life as I was driving over to Jessa's house. And I got over there and we went for a walk and I sensed labored breathing and just the heaviness. And I knew that what she was getting ready to tell me was really serious and mattered a lot to Jessa. And she said to me that she wanted me to hear this from her first.
Dr. James Dobson: Yeah. You had no clue what her background was.
John Crisp: No clue. I just knew she was incredibly special and that she loved the Lord and we were getting to know each other. So, every day was something new. And she shared with me that she was a survivor of human trafficking and shared with me some of the headlines of what had taken place, the 30,000 foot view and didn't give me any other details at that time. But I entered a grieving process as I was dealing with the realities of what Jessa had experienced, this woman that I was falling in love with and what that meant for our relationship and what that meant for our future together and-
Dr. James Dobson: Let me tell you about my own experience with Shirley, because she never went through anything like this. But her father was an alcoholic and she had a great mother who really got her through. But every person listening to us who's had an alcoholic parent knows that the one thing you do not want to do is reveal who you are and where you've been.
And so, I went with Shirley for a summer, a whole summer and was really beginning to realize what a great lady she was, and is. And we were talking one night, we were on campus and we were alone, and we were talking and she said, "I have something I have to tell you." And I said, "My goodness, what is it?" And she told me about her childhood and some of the experiences, and she said, "I've been afraid to tell you because I thought that it would not make you interested in me anymore." I don't know what reaction you had, but mine was to have my eyes filled with tears and say, "Shirley, I want to spend the rest of my life making up to you for what you've been through."
John Crisp: Wow.
Dr. James Dobson: Did you feel the same way?
John Crisp: Absolutely. Absolutely, I think in that moment I was able to communicate to Jessa that she was not defined by her past and that she was a beautiful creation and Christ-
Dr. James Dobson: Were you a believer by that time?
John Crisp: Yes. Yes, very much.
Dr. James Dobson: And so you also made your contribution to her understanding of the gospel?
John Crisp: Yeah, absolutely. I think as the gospel is a message of grace. I think that was-
Dr. James Dobson: What a great love story. Jessa, the Lord brought John into your life, didn't he?
Jessa Crisp: Oh, he did. And I'm so great-
Dr. James Dobson: Just took a little while for him to get the message across to you.
Jessa Crisp: Our story in our life and our marriage was definitely one of redemption.
Dr. James Dobson: How have you removed from your mind the images and the feelings and the abuse that you have been through when you were at your most vulnerable, when you are a little kid? Does it haunt you now? Do you still have dreams? You still wake up and say, "This will happen to me again." Do you go through those things?
Jessa Crisp: I totally do. And I have been on what I call my healing journey. And when I first started my healing journey, those nightmares were every single day, if not couple times a day, and the triggers and the flashbacks. And as I have progressed and working with a therapist and engaging with Christ in the deepest areas of my pain, I have been able to move into a place where today I can say, "Yes, I still get triggered. Yes, I still see a therapist. Yes, I still have flashbacks, but it does not control my life." And it's gotten much less than it used to be.
Dr. James Dobson: You seem whole, you seem healthy, you seem incredibly secure. How could that have happened? That had to be a gift from the Lord? Didn't it?
Jessa Crisp: It truly is a gift from God. And a lot of people have walked this journey with me in a very intimate way and have been on their knee, praying with me, praying for me, and then God brought this man beside me, and he's been part of that journey as well. And so, it has been a very difficult journey, but also too, I wouldn't trade it for anything because it's given me a deep appreciation for whom my God is.
John Crisp: That's right.
Dr. James Dobson: Why do you think there is so little compassion for kids who are going through this? I mean, I got to tell you, talking to Linda Smith, many members of Congress oppose any efforts to reach out to kids like this, and they do whatever they can to allow the men to get away with it. They see the men as the victim. And in fact, when they discover a child who is being abused in this way, they often blame the child, the individual. Have you been aware of that?
Jessa Crisp: I have.
Dr. James Dobson: That's what Linda has shared with us. Why in the world is there so little heart for these kids that are just being ripped to pieces?
Jessa Crisp: I don't have a good answer. I think that is something that we might not know fully until we get to Heaven, but I often wonder if there's a lot more moving pieces than what we could make sense of. There could be a trauma that's not being addressed in the lives of other individuals. And if we don't address our own trauma, how can we have compassion for somebody else?
John Crisp: Before I met Jessa, my conception of human trafficking was very much centered around what we see in Hollywood, that it's something that happens elsewhere. And as we were looking on the Polaris website, the recent statistics are that in Denver, it's a $39.9 million industry. In Atlanta, it's 240 million.
Dr. James Dobson: Trafficking?
John Crisp: Human trafficking.
Dr. James Dobson: 39? Say that again?
Jessa Crisp: point 9.
John Crisp: $39.9 million-
Jessa Crisp: A year.
John Crisp: ...a year.
Dr. James Dobson: In one city?
John Crisp: In Denver.
Jessa Crisp: In Denver alone.
Dr. James Dobson: Unbelievable.
John Crisp: Yeah. So, it's that righteous anger that makes you want to just go out and make a difference. And that's why as I was falling in love with Jessa, I knew very quickly that this was going to be a mission that we both fight and that we were going to join arms and make this a battle that we were going to fight together or so.
Dr. James Dobson: I mentioned last time that I was on the Attorney General's Commission on Pornography, where we heard testimony about all of this.
John Crisp: Yes.
Dr. James Dobson: One of the persons who came to testify was a man named Barry Lynn. Barry worked for the ACLU, and he came that day to speak on behalf of pornographers and said, "Child pornography is not a good thing. It shouldn't happen. But once it happens, there should be no restriction on the sale or distribution of it."
John Crisp: Wow.
Dr. James Dobson: Much of the pain and that angst associated with child pornography is what happens when it is commercially sold. There is a photograph of a girl or a boy going through the most horrendous experience of their lives, and there's not anything that they can do to get those materials, those photographs, all of those horrible experiences that are documented. It's documented child abuse, it's what it is, and that there should be no limitation on it. I came out of my chair, I mean, that's-
John Crisp: Thank you.
Dr. James Dobson: ...the ACLU at its worst.
Jessa Crisp: I can say as a survivor of child pornography, that even today, knowing that people are still viewing my images, which they are, I had conversation not too long ago, again with individuals that are helping me on that side. And it's hard because as somebody who's experienced that and knowing those images are still being viewed in some ways, if I think about it for too long, it makes me feel like it's still happening to me. I'm still being raped in some way. Somebody's still making money off of me in some way and in some means.
Dr. James Dobson: Have you seen evidence of that or you just know it?
Jessa Crisp: I have. So, we have found IP addresses and law enforcement has looked into that. And it definitely is a pain that I still carry.
Dr. James Dobson: John, it must absolutely eat your heart out.
John Crisp: Yeah, absolutely. And I see, Jessa, going through and dealing with the realities that some of that stuff is still out there, and the reality is it's probably a losing battle in terms of getting it off of the internet because they're very crafty in the ways that they change IP addresses and how they constantly evade any sort of law enforcement repercussions. And yeah, it's really frustrating and upsetting. And I think what needs to happen is we bring light and awareness into the realities that there is an inescapable connection between human trafficking and pornography. And I think the people who are making the pornography industry so profitable, I think we'll begin to chip away at that. And that might be when changes happen.
Dr. James Dobson: One of the findings of our commission is that whenever you find child abuse and especially child murder, the individuals who perpetrate these horrible crimes always, always, always have pornography in their homes or garages or cars. Always. I mean, it is inevitable. They get hooked on those images and it is progressive and addictive. And once they're hooked on it, they want to experience it and it leads to the ultimate, which is what happened to Ted Bundy. And I interviewed him just 17 hours before he was executed, and that was his story. He asked me to tell everybody, to parents especially, beware because that stuff is deadly. And he said it's what led him to kill what we now believe to have been a hundred or more women. And I was with him right before he died, and he wanted the world to know that these people are stalking your children and you better do something about it.
My goodness. I've spent 25 years trying to articulate the cause of these boys and girls. And Jessa, I thank you so much for sharing so passionately about your childhood. And you're going to overcome this? You got to be able to pass along help to others.
Jessa Crisp: Completely and I believe that that's only because of Jesus Christ being my healer and my redeemer.
Dr. James Dobson.: What do you hope to do?
Jessa Crisp: In the future?
Dr. James Dobson: Yes.
Jessa Crisp: Oh goodness. I want to get my doctorate in clinical psychology, and I would like to continue to work with my husband to be able to provide resources and hope to individuals who've been through human trafficking and other crimes that perpetrate evil against children.
Dr. James Dobson: And I'm sure it's your hope that by coming out of the closet, then talking about this as openly as you have, that there will be somebody out there that will say, me too.
John Crisp: Yes.
Jessa Crisp: Exactly.
Dr. James Dobson: Somebody out there that will say, I can't remain silent. I have got to fight this. And the scripture tells us that the Lord said, "Vengeance is mine, saith the Lord." I shuddered to think what the people who are doing this are going to face on the other side.
Jessa Crisp: Yeah.
John Crisp: That's right.
Dr. James Dobson: Can you imagine eternity in hell? And it's on a level almost of what the Nazis did to the Jews and Poles and Gypsies and others in World War II. Maybe on an individual basis rather than mass murder.
Jessa Crisp: Yep. A personal holocaust.
Dr. James Dobson: Yeah. Well, Jessa, there is so much in your story. We're talking a lifetime of experience, and nearly everything you went through is relevant to this aspect of your story. Thank God for the recovery that I see in here, and that the Lord just really gave you the strength to overcome it. Part of that miracle was that you were adopted by another family that loved you. Yeah. We've got one minute left. Tell us that.
Jessa Crisp: So, yeah, so I was adopted by a couple that truly love me and that have really been a huge part of my life in helping me walk in recovery, and teaching me how to grow closer to God. And so, through that, I really believe that without them in my life, I would never have been able to have gotten married to John because they truly taught me what it was like to live in a family, to see marriage lived out to-
Dr. James Dobson: It's the first time you've ever felt loved.
Jessa Crisp: It was. Yeah.
Dr. James Dobson: Oh my. John, take care of this lady.
John Crisp: Absolutely. Absolutely.
Dr. James Dobson: This is jewel.
John Crisp: I agree.
Dr. James Dobson: Keep us informed as your life unfolds.
Jessa Crisp: Will do.
Dr. James Dobson: And I want to say to our listeners who are out there, help us deal with this issue. There aren't very many people talking about it. People don't want to talk about it. Some people will not hold still to listen to it. And I want to tell you, pastors will not talk about it for the most part. Now, they don't talk about pornography because sitting out in front of them are hundreds and hundreds, maybe thousands of men who are into the stuff. And that's wrong too. And so, we're doing everything we can to articulate it and to plead your cause, and you've helped us do that to date, John and Jessa Crisp. And your middle name is Dillow?
Jessa Crisp: Correct.
Dr. James Dobson: That's your adopted family?
Jessa Crisp: That's my adopted family.
Dr. James Dobson: And they're sitting in the gallery.
Jessa Crisp: They are.
Dr. James Dobson: Oh my goodness.
Jessa Crisp: And I love them a lot.
Dr. James Dobson: All right. Blessings to you all.
Jessa Crisp: Thank you.
John Crisp: Thank you.
Roger Marsh: Wow. What a story and what a blessing that Jessa had been taken in by a loving couple at a time when she needed that extra support. She truly is an amazing godly woman who has overcome so much in her life. You're listening to Family Talk, and I'm Roger Marsh. And that was the conclusion of part two of Dr. Dobson's three-part conversation with Jessa and John Crisp. Tomorrow, Dr. Dobson, along with Jessa and John will be joined by Linda and Jody Dillow, a loving couple who provided a safe and stable home for Jessa after she escaped her abusers. Now, if you or someone you know is a victim of human trafficking, call the National Trafficking Hotline today at 1-888-3737-888. Or simply text the word "help" to 233733. And I want to encourage you to keep Jessa in your prayers as she continues to heal from these traumatic events.
Now, throughout Scripture, Jesus said an example for about how we should treat others with acts of service. At the Last Supper you'll recall, He washed the disciples feet, and while in the community, He fed large crowds. Ultimately, Jesus showed us how to serve others. So, what could that mean for a marriage? Selfishness can ruin a marriage, but selflessness can heal and raise a marriage to wonderful new heights, but it takes two. Elevate your marriage to a new level by signing up for Dr. James Dobson's 10 Day Marriage Series Challenge. Simply sign up on our website at drjamesdobson.org. That's drjamesdobson.org. To join the challenge, all you have to do is visit that homepage and select the 10 day Marriage Series icon in the upper right hand corner of the page. Once you click onto the Marriage Series image, you'll be directed to the 10 Day Marriage Series signup page. Simply input your email address and then click on the Sign Up button.
From that day on, and for the next 10 days afterwards, you'll receive an email from Dr. Dobson every day about how to improve the spiritual health of your marriage. You'll enjoy reading some words of wisdom from Dr. Dobson himself. You'll have some short exercises to participate in and a prayer that you can pray with and for your spouse each and every day. Again, to sign up for the 10 Day Marriage Challenge, simply go to our homepage drjamesdobson.org.
While we talked about a lot of serious issues today, if there was a stirring in your heart to reach out and talk to someone or ask for prayer, please know our trained customer care team is here for you 24 hours a day, seven days a week. Let us pray with you and for you. You can also share your thoughts, your comments, or any other concerns you might have. The number to call is 877-732-6825. That's 877-732-6825.
Well, I'm Roger Marsh, and from all of us here at the Dr. James Dobson Family Institute, we hope you and your family have a peaceful and blessed rest of your day. Join us again next time right here for another edition of Dr. James Dobson's Family Talk.
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